I've been thinking about this a lot today. Recently I was asked to consider a job outside of the home teaching. I have not worked a "real" job for 10 years. I did some grant writing, I've volunteered the equivelent of a full time job, but other than that, nothing.
I studied the field that the job is in, I teach it to my children at home, I remain active in other ways in this field, but I do not feel qualified to teach at a school. Why? Because I think there are many more out there who could do the job better.
The funny thing is that this offer to teach is running parallel with the discernment of a vocation, I am having the same issues with. Again, I think that there must be a mistake, I've mislead people, someone else would do a much better job. I've been on the fence for nearly 6 months trying to figure out what I am supposed to do.
Am I truly aware of the fact that I am not qualified for either? If that is the case, it could it be called humility? I see my flaws, I realize that the school/world would be better served by another. If it is self- doubt, Then it is the opposite of Humility influencing my decisions, Pride. Pride would have me fear failure and my embarrassment more than the good that could come from my service.
"All the time it is you , you , you. And you will never be effective until it is him, him, him, so that you act in nomine Domini --in the name and the strength of God" - The Furrow 699
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