I had a revelation this week, and honestly, I'm not sure why it took me so long. These little (or not so little in the cast of the 11 yr. old female!) are going to grow up someday and not have me to butter their toast. They need to learn to do this on their own.
Sure, my kids do chores , and plenty of other independent things, they have responsibilities, but I still baby them as much as I can. The youngest is almost 5, and I still baby him far too much. I had a vision of him, 30, in my home, with me doing all the things I do now for him, that he could do on his own. Frightening. There is a time for babying and a time for training up children to be independent adults. The time has come for more lessons in the later.
Sure, I will still cook for them, but why can't I expect them to help with the cooking? They all need to learn to sort and wash clothes eventually, why not at least give them a taste of it now? It seems like common sense, which is why I'm so embarrassed I forgot. But what seems so logical has become a lost mentality.
My husband manages a store, and several of his staff still live at home, well into their 20's, and depend upon their parents for a car, home and food. I was married at 22, and had a child at 23. It is completely ridiculous that this is becoming common place. We are becoming a nation of children in adult bodies. China has been struggling with this same problem for a few years now, because of the doting that one child receives.
The 4th of July is a reminder of our Nation's Independence, let's try to be patriotic, and raise our children to be independent adults.
1 comment:
It's the sort of thing almost all of us will say to ourselves in some way at some time, about little things at least. There are big things we should make sure they learn that our culture currently ignores along with the little kind, such as how to sustain lifelong relationships, how to persevere in one's educational and career goals (they're pretty much the same thing) while living a real life, how to trust other people, to say nothing of learning to live as a child of God. It's not that you want your children to be independent, you want them to be interdependent, and to take their places in God's plan for them gladly rather than weakly and halfheartedly.
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