Tuesday, December 29, 2009

Begin Again.

I'm glad it is Christmas, this was quite possibly the most trying Advent for me in my adult life. Trying does not mean bad, just draining emotionally. I was challenged to change, lost a loved one, and had to deal with a few pedestals I'd put people on.

Change sucks. I'm bad at it, and prefer my old ways, however, once in a while it becomes necessary to examine one's actions. Sometimes in doing so, we realize, we have already changed. Then the difficulty comes in knowing although you are content with the change, others preferred the "old you". What to do, what to do? If I had my way, which I never do, I would force change upon others, but this is not practical. How can the blow be softened to others. First prayer seems to work wonders, secondly, patience. Thirdly, wine. Yep, a little vino goes a long way, for both parties.

Every day is a new chance to begin again, not just projects that go unfinished, but relationships, resolutions, and life. Every day is a clean slate, full of opportunities to do good, have fun and love. Christmas is the greatest ever reminder of this. For generations the people of God turned away from him, but in one moment, because of one child, they ( and we) could begin again.

Merry Christmas!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Paving the Road to Hell

Good intentions run rampant here. Whether it be my desire to write a worthwhile blog, or my volunteering or most importantly raising my kids right. My desire and intentions are good, I promise, but the results, maybe not.

Life has a funny way of sidetracking me. I really wanted to make Advent special here, on the blog, but my 8 hour a week part-time job turned into a 20 hour a week job without me noticing. I have begun to sacrifice things I enjoy, like writing and baking for running around taking kids to lessons. I have given up daily mass, because I have to be at work at the same time. I used to read, now I cram things into my brain as quickly as possible. There is no joy in that.

How do we find peace and solace in the busy-ness and chaos? I truly do not have a solution. My one hour of adoration a week is not cutting it anymore, may prayer the rest of the week is stale, and I know I need life in it, but right now, I do now have it in me to figure out how.